what i gather~~~

today monday 29th dec 2008 2035hrs;

what i gather is dat i have friends, i have dreams, i have family who love me... that what i ask for n nothing more... does dat sound about right?? not really... dat was just me putting on a face, a brave front... i need more...

i am thankful for the generous and loving family dat i have, the very best friends anyone could ever hope for. i have those n i am thankful. what is missing for me now is the self-satisfaction that i did good. falling for someone is not one of them. dat was not a good thing to do. but to fall for someone who has a partner already is a BIG NO-NO for me. i cant afford to do that. i wanna erase all these feelings and just be someone that i know i am... i do not want to tear them apart... never in my life...

talked to a few of my good friends about this n all of them said i am not to blame... i beg to differ... i have to fall out of love with that person... i have to n i need to... my mind has made this decision n i am just waiting for my heart to listen... i am still waiting...

had a long chat with simah after she read my previous posts... it was on the 28th i think... i was feeling especially down on dat day coz i was thinking about it n missing the memories... chat with simah n lo n behold! she did not judge as deena didnt as well... therefore i am thankful dat i have them... gld dat i talked with them n feel better about it... i honestly did... talked a lil with jam but didnt tell all n talked with kam as well... all of them made me feel better... never in my life have i known such good friends as they... i will tell jeehah when the tym comes... n i am pretty sure she will not judge... and faats too...

and so today, i have made up my mind to just let go n avoid... avoid this issue n just go cold turkey. i will triumph... i alwys have n i will...

i am a strong gal... i have always known that.. but i am stronger with my friends having my back... i am thankful... i dunno what i would do without them...

and so my friends, i salute you... you have been the warmest most generous friends i could ever ask for... n i appreciate each one of you... just so u know, i will be there whenever u nd me... just as you have...

enough said... love ya guys!!! girl power!!!